For M

No you tell me now, what am I supposed to do now. What do I do without you. I can't eat, i can't sleep, he'll I can't even breathe. I can cry, and that I do. Is that you wanted for me? Why did you leave me? Why Monika? Didn't I love you? Didn't you believe that the love was the? Weren't you happy with me? Was i not good enough for you? Didn't I do everything I could?

I love you. There is no past tense in love. I love you Monika, I do.

Even though you don't.

For M

Bitch, you should have died. I wish you drop dead right now. You know what, you should commit suicide. Slit your wrist and then slit your own throat. That will make me happy.

Why are you still reading this blog? What do you want from me? You are too ashamed to call aren't you.

I'm feeling suicidal. This is getting too much for me. Its 9 PM here. Its raining out. Rain used to make me feel good. Now it makes me want to kill myself. Its a long night. I hope I survive till morning. I don't want to die. But this rain and night is making me. I'm trying not to think about ways to do it. I'm a pre-crastinator. So if I couldn't plan it, I'm sure I'd survive. Hope this works. Or this could be my last post. You'll know.

This is going to be a long night.

I'm feeling suicidal. This is getting too much for me. Its 9 PM here. Its raining out. Rain used to make me feel good. Now it makes me want to kill myself. Its a long night. I hope I survive till morning. I don't want to die. But this rain and night is making me. I'm trying not to think about ways to do it. I'm a pre-crastinator. So if I couldn't plan it, I'm sure I'd survive. Hope this works. Or this could be my last post. You'll know.

This is going to be a long night.

I'm feeling suicidal. This is getting too much for me. Its 9 PM here. Its raining out. Rain used to make me feel good. Now it makes me want to kill myself. Its a long night. I hope I survive till morning. I don't want to die. But this rain and night is making me. I'm trying not to think about ways to do it. I'm a pre-crastinator. So if I couldn't plan it, I'm sure I'd survive. Hope this works. Or this could be my last post. You'll know.

This is going to be a long night.

I check the traffic stats of this blog daily. Its not much, but it says how many people, and from which country, visited which post. Whenever someone visits, I feel its you.

Depressed people are the loneliest, talking to no one, meeting no one, because no one wants a miserable person, but those are the ones who need the people most.

Happy birthday

Happy birthday, Bitch. Why don't you just drop dead! You are the worst person I know. I am so ashamed that I ever loved you.

I can't live like this. I have to die now.

Btw, how lame a word is suicide. Cmon.

If you love someone, you don't leave. This is for anyone reading this who claims to have loved me. You don't actually and you never did either. You left, means you never loved. Period. All you said were lies. You are a cheat. May you rot in hell.

I blame you.

Everyone should die. You know, just drop dead. Starting with me. There is no reason to go on. No one has.

I feel so alive when I cry

So its 22 Feb. No big deal. Why should I care

Feels good to be missed, I'm just sayin

Feelin cranky or be happy,
be it angry or be sad.
Laugh at me or cry to me,
or shout and be mad.
My world is built around you,
without you, it would collapse
So just miss me once in a while,
that is all I ask

I miss you ok! Its impossible to live like this. Tum dimag se nikal hi nahi rahe!

When I look into your eyes
Your love is there for me
And the more I go inside
The more there is to see


-George Harrison

You know I have always been scared of you. You have always been so powerful. Independent. You always knew more than me. I never knew why you loved me. You were the stronger one.

I used loved instead of love, because I am not sure what you feel for me right now. I don't blame you if the verb is in past tense for you. It going to be always present for me. But you already know that, like always.

Do you hear me saying good night to you, everynight?